The Keys to Abundant Self-Confidence
"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing." - Abraham Lincoln
Confidence is power. The power to attract; to persuade; to influence; and to succeed. Imagine what life would be like if you had abundant self-confidence.
Confidence is not a genetic trait; it's a learned one. Which means that you CAN have it in abundance. Start here. Use these three simple guidelines to help you start experiencing the joy and ease that flows from abundant self-confidence.
1. Think confidence.
Confidence begins in the mind. What you think of yourself influences the way you feel about yourself, which in turn, affects the way you speak and act. "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." - Eleanor Roosevelt. So the first thing you must do to create abundant self-confidence is to start THINKING with confidence. Pay attention to your internal dialogue; notice when you allow doubt or negativity to control the course of your thoughts.
Replace self-defeating thoughts with an image of confidence. Focus on your strengths; on what comes easily and naturally to you. Define these qualities as your "personal brilliance". Practice replacing your doubts with an image of confidence every time that doubt or negativity enters your mind.
Remember that whatever you believe, with feeling, becomes your reality. The more intensely that you believe something to be true, the more it is.
2. Create a confidence-building environment.
Your environment has tremendous influence on you. The people you spend time with, the books you read, the music you listen to all contribute to the way you think and feel about yourself and the world at large.
Put simply, your environment either builds you up or drags you down.
If you are in a situation where you're discouraged -- be that a miserable job or an unhealthy relationship -- you must change that situation if you want your confidence level to grow.
Create an environment which supports you in your desire for abundant self-confidence. Spend time with confident people. Eliminate the influences that erode your personal image of success. Don't let someone else influence or determine your destiny. Give yourself the opportunity to flourish and grow!
3. Practice, practice, practice!
"What we have to learn to do, we learn by doing." - Aristotle. It takes a lot of practice to develop a habit. Confidence, over time, becomes a habit.
As a student of confidence, begin to study confident people. Observe their body language, their vocal qualities. Practice the simple qualities of confidence -- eye contact, smiling, open body postures, a firm handshake. Resist the urge to curl the end of your sentences such that statements sound like questions. Be decisive.
Plan confidence-building situations; particularly new situations where people don't know you and have no pre-conceived opinions or expectations of you.
Practice, practice, practice!
(c) 2003 Marta Z. Kagan
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