Holding A Family Meeting

Any modern family -- especially one with kids -- will see their fair share of struggles. Among these problems are things like . . . Conflict between siblings; Recurring child discipline problems; Fights over space or property; Resentment that builds over everyday aggravations; Discontent over family roles; Parent-child conflict; Teen rebellion; And so on.

Would you be surprised that there's a fairly simple remedy that can help you overcome these problems? I know, it all appears too good to be true, like an infomercial. But by conducting consistent family meetings, you actually can put an end to many of the problems that hinder families your family.

What are family meetings, and how do they help?

Family meetings are founded upon a simple idea. Corporations would not be managed very effectively if the workers went off in their own direction and no one ever discussed the necessary business of the company. Yet most families go for long periods of time without ever sitting down together to review how well the family is functioning.

Without this consistent maintenance, family relationships can start to break down. Problems are allowed to fester just underneath the surface, and people start to feel resentment over things that might otherwise be minor issues. Family meetings provide a way to address these grievances before they blow up into sources of conflict.

Do teens really sit through family meetings?

If you have a teenager, you're probably thinking, ?My kid is never going to sit through this.? But you might be surprised. Teens are actually some of the biggest advocates for family meetings, because they provide a way for adolescents to negotiate family rules. It gives them a venue to express their opinion, and helps them feel as though you're treating them more like an adult.

There are several things that go into conducting an effective family meeting:

1. You should conduct them on a regular basis. A weekly or bi-weekly schedule usually works best, but a monthly meeting can also accommodate the needs of most families.

2. Family meetings should combine a business-style atmosphere with a fun and relaxed setting. For example, some families take turns electing a 'chairman' for each meeting and discuss a list of talking points as though it were a board-room meeting. Yet they also might order pizza or have ice cream to make it fun and enjoyable, and something that kids will look forward to.

3. It's best not to wait for conflicts to arise before calling a meeting. These gatherings should be conducted during good times and bad. If you only get together whenever things are going wrong, your kids will start to view family meetings more like a lecture session, which erodes the positive climate that will make these sessions beneficial.

So if you sense that not everyone in your family seems to be on the same page, or if you find yourself spending a lot of time addressing recurring conflicts with your children, give family meetings a try. You just may come to wonder how you ever lived without them.

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