How To Be Present For Five Minutes

Be present for five minutes: Here is a challenge so simple that you might think it isn't even worth a try. But humor me, and let's see what happens. Commit to being present with one person in your life every day this week for five whole minutes.

I'm asking you to stay totally focused for the whole time. You cannot think of other things, multitask, think about your to-do list, or even plan what you will do or say next. Just simply listen. Look into their eyes and let them know that what they are saying is absolutely the most important thing in that moment.

Can you do this for five minutes? Well, it turns out it's not so easy for me. As a working mother, I have gotten really good at doing three or four or ten things at once. At first, I thought this was serving me well. But over time I realized that in actuality, I was not giving my full attention to anyone or anything.

Typing an email, talking on the phone, and half-listening to my daughter, while keeping my toddler occupied used to be my normal way of life. Honestly, all this multi-tasking was really quite exhausting and distracting as I was largely somewhere else most of the time. At work, I wasn't focused on the conversations at hand, and at home I was only half-listening to what was happening around me in a futile attempt to maintain perfection.

Make an effort to really stay present with the people in your life. I promise you will be amazed at how much you have been missing while you were "accomplishing."

Don't put too much focus on the future: We all think that focusing on "the next thing" will make us happy. "My life will be much better as soon as I lose 20 pounds," or "As soon as I get this project done, I will finally be able to take some quality time off with my kids."

There's nothing wrong with thinking about your future--in fact, having a purposeful vision of where you want to go and what you want to achieve is extremely important. But at the same time, focusing too much energy on what you want to happen, or what should have happened, results in missing out on what is occurring in the here and now.

Parker will only speak in his little four-year-old voice for a little longer. Emily will only want to wear sparkles in her hair for a few more years. And who knows how much longer Megan will openly share her boy-band crushes with me.

These conversations and moments are only here right now. We never know what the future holds, so we need to learn to appreciate the present.

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