Online Dating Tips For The Shy Men And Women In Internet Dating

I have a friend who is just chronically shy. It's sweet most of the time, and cute how she hides every time there's a remote stranger who wants to join us for lunch or rides the same elevator that we do. However, it does feel quite frustrating when we're out having fun, and she just stays in a corner, too shy to mingle. My friends and I didn't understand this, because she's a pretty lady, and she had things going on for her. Not a few times have we bodily pushed her to a guy who shows interest in her. Well obviously that won't work. So we urged her to try online dating, since most of my friends who've tried it have been successful in looking for their ideal match online. Surprise, surprise though. She'd gone through two weeks of her free trial period, and she hadn't sent a single e-mail to anyone.

We always push our shy friends to "Go! Just do it! Come on, chin up! Believe in yourself! All you need to do is go up and say 'hi!' Go!" Well, our friends will just tend to say that "If only it were that easy."

We may think that we are pretty confident. We'd like to think that we can confidently cross the room to chat it up with a handsome guy or a cute girl. However, when it comes to crunch time, you'll know it's not that easy. Most often than not, in reality, we find ourselves frozen in our seats, our minds magically devoid of any thought, our stomachs rolling, our mouth drying up.

In online dating, you have to face the same shyness and challenges too. Most of the time, even with the relative screen of anonymity, some online daters find it hard to initiate an online conversation.

What is the best thing that you can do when you are hesitating to press the "SEND" button on your e-mail for your single?

This: LIVE FOR THE MOMENT.

Sound cliché? Absolutely. Sound cheesy? Yes. But you know what, it's the truth. What stops you from initiating a conversation with others? Well, sometimes or not most of the time, the reason is the fear of being rejected. We sometimes dwell too much on the things that could happen (What if he rejects me? What if she doesn't reply to my mails?) and the things that had happened in the past (What if he breaks my heart like my last ex? What if she dumps me, just like that girl?), that we forget to focus in our life NOW.

Dwelling on these "what-ifs" only stops people from healing and moving forward. It forces us to dwell in the past hurts and we cannot change something that has happened in the past, and thinking of "if onlys" won't help lessen the pain either. The best thing that you can do so that your mind won't slip back on the "what-ifs" is to focus your energies on the PRESENT, what is happening NOW.

It's not easy to live in the moment with just a snap of a finger. We can't change the way we think at a snap of our fingers. But the good news is that you can develop this kind of attitude overtime, with a constant desie to change and make yourself a better person. as you go through with your everyday life, you should always be conscious about what you are doing, the things around you, how they affect you. Put yourself in THIS moment and do not think of the past nor keep dreaming about the future. This will not only help you get a date, but more importantly, it'll help you overcome your anxieties, and make you a better person.

Comments? Questions? Email Here

© HowtoAdvice.com

How to Advice .com