Oscar-Winning Introductions: How to Establish Meaningful Business Relationships

Awkward pauses, "uh's" and other meaningless sounds are deadly when starting a conversation with someone you just met. They can also be death on building a meaningful business relationship that will be of benefit to you and to the other person. You must be able to express clearly who you are, what you do, who you serve and the benefits of your services. How else can someone decide to hire you or to refer someone to you for services?

Scripting Your Production:

Think in terms of producing an award-winning film. This template will help you write a great 'script' that articulates what you do. Fill in the blanks with your most explicit answer. Your answers don't have to be the same every time you meet someone, but they do have to be explicit.

These are the opening scenes in your movie. Start from the beginning, most foundational scene and add another descriptive scene about you and your business as you have time and/or the other person asks you questions.

Scene #1:

"My name is ______________." (Truly, you can do this!)

Scene #2:

"I'm a ____(specific title)_____."

Title is optional and can in fact sometimes confuse people, so skip "Scene #2" if you feel it will add to the clarity of your introduction. If you must give yourself a title, make it as explicit as possible: CPA, divorce recovery coach, research scientist, public opinion pollster, etc.

Scene #3:

"I ___(action verb)___ ___(specifically 'who')___ ___ (outcome or accomplishment)__."

Use this template to combine who you serve with a powerful statement of benefit. Make it 15 words or less and as specific as possible. Your goal is to grab the other person's attention and start the conversation. Don't worry that you haven't described all the different kinds of people you serve or all the ways in which you serve them, or even all the ways they benefit. Stick to just one in introducing yourself: there will be time later to expand as the conversation progresses. Examples: CPA: "I help small businesses pay less to Uncle Sam without breaking the law." Coach: "I coach recently divorced women to rebuild their lives on their own terms." Research scientist: "I do medical research to make our society safer from killer diseases."

Scene #4:

"My best clients ________(action verb)_____ ______(object of the verb)_________."

Identify in explicit action terms what problem you help solve. One school of thought says "ratchet up the pain" and another says "highlight the desired outcome." I believe in the first introductory conversation, ratcheting up the pain is usually preferable. Examples: CPA: "My clients are determined not to be victims of unfair or vague tax laws." Coach: My clients are pulling together lives that have been shattered by divorce." Research Scientist (a little more difficult because they tend not to serve individuals as such, but still quite possible): "I serve the fragile people in our society who are most susceptible to life-threatening infections."

Rehearsals:

Once your 'script' is written, memorize your lines and then practice it out loud in front of the mirror. "Out loud" because the muscles and nerves in your mouth need the practice as much as you brain does. "In front of the mirror" because you need to be comfortable with the sensory input of eyes and faces in front of you.

When the words flow easily off your tongue without having to think about it, practice each increment with someone who already knows you and won't put a lot of pressure on you to be perfect. Once you have it down pat with a friend or two, practice your introduction whenever the opportunities arise. Sometimes it will only be Scene #1, your name. Other times you will need to add more scenes; just be sure to add them in a logical sequence.

On Location:

Great as your introduction must be, it's still just the "Opening Scene" and requires quality, engaging dialogue to follow. Best advice is to be a great listener yourself and encourage the other person to talk. Sharing the spotlight in a natural give and take of information and interest is the way to build meaningful relationships, the foundation of all service businesses.

In this engaging dialogue you must know the questions to ask as well as the answers you will give to those same questions. Examples include:

YOU Questions: * How did you get started? * How did you decide to become a ______________? * What makes you well qualified to provide this service? * What is the primary reason for your success? * How do you see your business in 5 years? 10 Years?

CLIENT Questions: * What kind of problems do your clients usually face? * What kind of solutions do your clients seek? * How do you measure the outcome of your services? * What do all your clients have in common? * What personality traits do they share? * How else are they similar? * Why are they drawn to you? * What draws you to them? * Who would *not* be a good client for you?

Logistical Questions: * Where is your office? * How do you market your services? * How do you meet new clients? * How is your service provided? * How do clients usually find and contact you? * Do your clients come back to you for further services?

And One Big, Essential "I" Question: * How can I help you be more successful?

Your guidance in asking these kinds of questions will not only give you valuable information, but will also prompt the other person to ask you relevant questions so you can provide information that will help him assist you in your business. Mutual give and take of information, interest and assistance is the basis of a relationship that can benefit you both for years.

Next thing you know, you could be winning an Oscar for "Most Effective Introduction to a Meaningful Business Relationship."

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