One-Way Love

Being love sick is not fun. It distracting and debilitating.

You may be in a situation in which you feel that the passion and affection between you and someone special is flowing in only one direction - FROM you and not TO you. This feeling can be quite depressing. The fact of this unreturned love and affection is constantly in your thoughts and saps your energy.

The other challenge with being in a one-way love situation is the sense that you have no control over the events. The relationship that you desire is not happening and there seems to be little that you can do to improve your situation.

The following step-by-step process is guaranteed to bring you some relief from your heartaches and assist you in returning to some sense of normalcy. Be warned this is tough going.

Step 1:

The first thing to do is to review the basis of your passion and affection. Test it for substance. Examine the main reasons why you like this individual. Question whether the grounds on which your love and affection are grounded are sustainable in the long term. If you are heavily swayed by physical attraction or things that can be gone tomorrow, your heartaches need not be long-lasting.

Physical attractions can be easily dispensed with if you choose to discipline your mind.

Step 2:

If you believe that the target of your love and affection is the real thing, then the next step is to evaluate your chances of getting the person to share your level of passion and interest. Perseverance is a virtue and sometimes people who refuse to give up actually reap surprisingly rich rewards.

At the same time, living in a fool's paradise is not helpful. Take a really hard look at the reality that you face.

Are there any real grounds for you to believe that the relationship that you seek will in fact materialize? It is frankly better to make the painful decision now than to grow more deeply attached to the "idea".

One-way love situations are really affairs of the mind. If you are not getting love in return then the relationship is really imaginary." It is all in your mind. This one-way love relationship is largely your creation. That might be insensitive but true. In any event, it is now up to you to extricate yourself from it.

Let's face it. If you cannot honestly see how this relationship is going to work out in your favor, what is the point of hanging on to this feeling. Setting up yourself for further heartache is not wise.

Step 3:

If you have been travelling down the road of one-way love, getting over it can be challenging. This next step is critical if you are to regain your peace of mind. You have to find something that fully engages your mind. It is very important that you immerse yourself in something that can distract you for long periods regularly.

The most suitable activities have these characteristics:

1. They are fun

2. They require you to expend physical energy

3. They involve other individuals who are highly compatible with you

4. They engage your thoughts outside of actual events

Step 4:

This is the real clincher. If you are still having difficulties after the first three steps then you need this.

Take the time to write by hand a letter addressed to the object of your affection outlining the nature and extent of your passion and why you think that a relationship with you will be something to be cherished by both partners.

You can then do one of two things:

1. Mail the letter and pray that eyes will be opened and that you will get the results that you desire.

The converse is that you might get a negative response and that should give you the impetus to move on.

2. Seal the letter in an envelope and store it in a safe place. You will have poured out your soul but you have decided to leave it in a "pending file" for the time being. You are not going to agonize over it but it is not quite dead.

It is not easy to make the decision to put this one-way love affair out of your mind. The idea of putting it on hold is great for your peace of mind.

Here's hoping that you will enjoy a future that is free of heartache and pain. But it is said that it is better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.

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