Spotting Compulsive Liars - A Guide For You

So, what is a compulsive liar? What is the difference between that and you everyday typical liar? Before we delve into this fully, perhaps something to look into first is our own lying. Oh yes, YOU are also a big fat liar! I lie too, we have all done it - hopefully we are always trying not to though, and wrestle with it when we have to. So if you think you are pretty straightforward for the most part, what is a compulsive liar in comparison? Well, the most evident thing is that they lie, repeatedly, as a habit, lacking the same thought processes that we go through if we ever bend the truth. One more thing before we start down the path to spotting compulsive liars though, we also need to look at the distinction between a pathological liar and a compulsive liar. These two types are not the same you see, but people usually use them without differentiation. To explain the difference quickly: Compulsive liars will often lie for no personal gain - they just do it habitually. It is an ingrained response that they've learned over time. They do however realize they are being dishonest, and are generally conscious of the effects of the lies; they just cannot seem to stop the lying. This might be a symptom of lack of confidence and minimal self-worth, so they fabricate stories to shield or boost them self. Pathological lying is a tiny bit different in that the liar worries little that they are lying, and will lie to you to get some sort of advantage. They are reminiscent of a sociopath in many respects and don't mind who they hurt as long as their dishonesty gets them to their goal. To detect a liar who is pathological is very tough! So with this being said, how can you detect a compulsive liar, and what should you do about them? Somebody who is so familiar with lying has the unfortunate capability to prevent giving hints about many signs of deceit. This is either a trained reaction to not divulge some cues to lying, but more frighteningly it could be because they start to believe the lies they are telling! This means they are much harder to detect in a dialog from observation - but not impossible! You can find a few things that compulsive liars do which will be seen from observing them for a short time, but become more obvious over time such as: Too Much Detail - Compulsive liars do not just bend the truth, they often lie extensively with many details to try to convince you of their honesty. Too Good - Some compulsive liars desire a boost to their self-esteem and will bend the truth to make their life look better than it is. This is now almost a plague on facebook where people upload just their best pictures and update their status all the time promoting a fake life Way Too Bad - Some compulsive liars will lie about how tragic life is for them. This is quite different and is more about wanting attention to get sympathy from you, or at least put them at the centre of attention. Contradictions - This is certainly the principal part in detecting a compulsive lair. Over time their deceits will start to contradict the other and they will highlight their deception. Calling them out on this might get them quite outraged and self-protective and cause them to produce bigger lies to cover it up though, so be cautious in the way you approach them. So there you have it, everyone lies - some use lies as a weapon - and some people can't stop lying. The final one is the compulsive liar and can be discovered. Most are not bad people though, but deserve our pity. You should be more troubled about the pathological liars however as they do not care who they hurt as long as they get their way.

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