Marriage Counseling - Learn How to Steer Clear of Being Pressured Into a Lousy Dating or Marriage Relationship When You're Flying Solo
There is a great deal of unhealthy pressure to be in a marriage relationship for tons of people who are presently flying solo. Sometimes the pressure hails from an outside source and on other occasions the pressure is created internally by the single individual. These kinds of pressure rarely ever create the sought after change.
The fundamental key to knowing how to duck being pressured into a bad marriage relationship, is to first be aware of what is provoking folks. Tons of these motivating dynamics are many times not as clear as folks want to believe. On far too many occasions people giving advice are motivated by some awfully lousy desires, the kind that are rather destructive.
A key one of the reasons people try to pressure those people close to them, is because they are scared of being alone. They are displeased at the reality that you're single and they are involved in a mediocre or crummy marriage relationship. They unconsciously wish for you to link up with them in their misery. Yes, this is a rather gloomy reason for one close to us to be motivated by, but the old saying does stand the test of time: misery truly loves company.
A conventional inner drive to be in a relationship emanates from a longing to be loved and valued. This inclination is commonplace, unless it derives from the person's hurt condition. When this crops up, a person looking out for a suitable mate will regularly make due with far less than they should. In addition, they will put naive demands on those they date or marry to meet far more of their wishes than their partner is capable of.
For folks similar to this, there is a dominant sensation of not being adept at "being on their own." These sort of people are behaving in a compulsive way, wishing that the dating or marriage relationship will be able to fill a gap in their lives that it wasn't intended to fill. I sincerely like the analogy of a dating or marriage relationship actually being like a bicycle you ride. A bicycle has a set of rolling wheels, and the success of the bike depends on the well being of both rolling wheels.
Marriage relationships perform the best when both individuals have the ability to enrich each other. A lofty amount of impartiality is needed to be in existence in a marriage for it to flourish. This can't occur when one of the mates is wanting to be repaired, or when one mate is endeavouring to rescue the other one. We can and need to support one another in our efforts to develop as people, yet the one and only person I have the power to change is myself.
Certainly, there are a number of extremely goodhearted people who long for the unattached individual to be able to enjoy what they themselves are relishing in their marriage relationship. These exemplify the type of folks a single person should try to spend plenty of time with. Pay close attention to these people and the voyage to a happy marital relationship will come to be immeasurably more attainable.
About the Author
Chris Keenan is the founder of inexpensive - risk free relationship aid at http://www.easyrelationshiphelp.com and is a steady guest on radio. Get a hold of your free copy of "How to Prevent Your Relationship From Losing Value" at http://www.easyrelationshiphelp.com
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