Change Is Easy When You Understand It

What would you do if you could not fail? Did you succeed? What did success feel like? What difference did you make?

Have you failed in the past? What did it feel like? Was it painful? What difference has it made to the way that you approach your goals? Was your past failure so painful that your fear is preventing you from setting new goals for the future?

Are you excited about 2009? Are you doing everything to be all that you can be? Do you have a vision, business plan and 90 day goals for 2009? Are you meeting and exceeding your goals for 2009?

These are the questions that came to mind as I flew out of Toronto after completing a financial advisor speaking presentation where less than ten hands went up out of one hundred financial advisors in the audience when I asked the question, "Do you have a vision, business plan and 90 day goals for 2009?"

As I reflect on this, the words of the CEO of a major MGA firm come to mind, "Why are these results happening? My biggest frustration is that we spend all kinds of time with a financial advisor to help them create and complete the sale. While the consumer receives excellent value from our products and services and the financial advisor is well rewarded for their efforts, we don't hear from the financial advisor until they are back into their line of credit."

"For the life of me, I can't understand it. One would think that the excitement of making a big sale would inspire the financial advisor to go out and sell more", said the CEO during the meeting that we had.

I explained that this type of financial advisor or rather "financial survivor" suffers from The Unmet Needs Disease and here is my theory.

Let's look at what got the financial survivor in the business in the first place.

Was it based on some of the following values of the financial advisor? Assist, Create, Demonstrate, Discover, Educate, Empathize, Engage, Enlighten, Enliven, Explain, Explore, Extend, Facilitate, Guide, Honour, Illuminate, Implement, Inspire, Invent, Learn, Listen, Nurture, Organize, Participate, Plan, Prepare, Realize, Refine, Renew, Respond, Sense, Strengthen, Support, Teach, Unite and Understand.

Was it based on these values that would compel them to assist their clients to build a strong financial plan to create financial freedom and a legacy that will last for generations?

Was it based on values that create positive feelings and positive beliefs?

Was it based on values and through service and the financial survivor would be rewarded in kind?

If this were the case, if the financial advisor were living their values, the financial survivor would be rewarded in many ways which would include a loving and supportive family, great friendships, a well balanced life with health, vitality, travel and hobbies all standing on the foundation of faith and inspiration.

Their business would be effortless built on vision, a plan and goals attracting a steady flow of higher net worth clients that come to them through a well orchestrated marketing system which is supported by a strong customer service team.

The sad reality, the financial survivor likely started in the financial business because they were not making enough money and they were unfulfilled in their past business or career and were caught up in the illusion that money buys you happiness, which was all created by the following dominant unmet needs; Approval, Control, Power, Recognition, Security and Worthiness.

Unmet needs are the source of negative beliefs and negative emotions, and based on the law of attraction; contribute to attracting the very thing that the financial survivor is trying to avoid.

When the financial survivor attempts to ask for a referral they sabotage themselves before they even start with their unmet need of Approval which is fuelled by the limiting belief that, "I might get rejected", and the limiting emotions of anxiety and fear.

When the financial survivor attempts to take the time to create a vision, business plan and goals they sabotage themselves before they even start with their unmet need of Security which is fuelled by the limiting belief that "I don't have enough time" and the limiting emotions of panic and overwhelm. The panic and overwhelm contribute to their adrenaline addiction making them feel really busy doing most of the wrong things.

While the financial survivor is addicted to unmet needs it is difficult to add value to others.

So they thought the solution to their lack of security was to become a financial advisor because they had heard that there was an infinite amount of money that could be made.

So they gave it all that they had and made it through those first years of the long hours of study and evening appointments. They made sales and the financial rewards started to flow. But there was still something missing.

Let's look back to their early stages of development to understand what may be missing.

The financial advisor may have been raised by parents that experienced the Depression or the War.

In the early years, their parents did their best to fulfill the child's physiological, emotional and spiritual needs.

Regrettably, if the parent went through a depression or war, it is likely that their physiological, emotional and spiritual needs were not met because like their forefathers before them, they were caught up in survival and one can't give something that you don't have and it is no fault of their own.

Instead of meeting the physiological, emotional and spiritual needs, the child is left with typical unmet needs of approval, control, recognition, safety and worthiness and no matter how hard the child tries to meet these unresolved unmet needs as they progress into their adult life, it is impossible to meet the unmet need from outside of themselves. It must be met from within.

It is highly likely that they intuitively picked up that there wasn't enough money and because the home environment wasn't safe. Many heard that they were not good enough or that things were not good enough.

As they grew into their teens, they started to reach out to the outside world to try to meet their unmet needs. They tried to meet their unmet needs through alcohol, cars, drugs, education, fashion, food, friends, hobbies, money, sex and sports ... and for a while, they may have been successful ... at the same time, they still felt something was missing.

Some found themselves in business and in sales.

Unmet needs can be both a blessing and a curse.

Imagine an oyster and the unmet need of security is the grain of sand. After many years the irritation of the grain of sand creates a beautiful pearl and this beautiful pearl has many business and sales skills.

At the same time, the irritation of the grain of sand is still there and no matter how hard they try, no matter how much they sell, they still don't feel secure or fulfilled.

As years go by, they continue their drive based on unmet needs like security that continues to fuel limiting beliefs that there isn't enough money and this creates limiting emotions of anxiety and fear.

Sure they stay motivated and may even break some sales records but their performance is up and down because there can never be enough money to satisfy the unmet need which must be met from within.

Eventually the grand daddy of all unmet needs, the need of worthiness catches up with them along with the limiting beliefs they are not good enough along with the limiting emotions of depression and sadness.

You can almost see them laying there on the couch on a Saturday morning completely burned out and pissed off at the world with the TV remote in their hand thinking, "is this all there is?" and "maybe there is something wrong with me?".

Fact: There is nothing wrong with them as it is only a lack of understanding.

Unmet needs are completely satisfiable, they must be met and they can be met.

When unmet needs are met the financial advisor lives their values and is rewarded in many ways which includes a loving and supportive family, great friendships, a well balanced life with health, vitality, travel and hobbies all standing on the foundation of faith and inspiration.

Their business is effortless built on vision, a plan and goals attracting a steady flow of higher net worth clients that come to them through a well orchestrated marketing system which is supported by a strong customer service team.

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