Teen Dating Does Not Mean Having Sex

Teaching Your Teens That It Is Okay To Just Say No

This may well appear a strange thing to say but a lot of parents do not understand how important it is to teach children that dating and sex are not the same thing. Sad though it is all too many teens just take it for granted that sex is a normal part of dating and a quick look at magazines and television aimed at this group reveals why this is so. Do not simply assume that your teenage children know the difference between dating and sex and see that you get this message across to them.

Make sure that you teach your children the ins and outs of dating and sex from an early age and reinforce this message frequently. Above all, help your children to appreciate that dating is all about getting to know other people emotionally and not only physically.

Teenage children will frequently have a 'single track mind' and you will have to put forward suggestion on other things that they can do when dating rather than simply focusing their minds on having sex. This might appear silly but you would be astonished at how often teenagers choose sex as an option simply because they are bored and cannot come up with anything better to do with their time. So, as crazy as it might appear you really will have to recommend things that your teenage children can do to enjoy themselves on a date. If you can get them to stay busy enough then they will almost certainly end up having to say no less frequently.

A significant number of parents instruct their teenage children on how to go about saying no to sex and come up with a lengthy list of excuses or retorts. The is fair enough but a retort only tends to work once and merely brushing off the idea with a retort is simply putting the question off in the short term and leaving the door open for the idea to keep coming up again and again. The answer therefore is to teach your child to simply say no sternly and clearly and that, although they might feel like giving reasons, they do not need to do so and simply saying no ought to be sufficient.

If you find yourself in the situation where your child has already had sex then you may feel that it is too late to talk to them about saying no. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Many teens feel that once they have had sex once they cannot reasonably refuse to do so again. The fact that they have experimented with sex however does not mean that this issue can simply be 'ticked off' their list of hurdles and you need to make it clear that they they are free to refuse sex if they feel uneasy. You also need to discuss with them the fact that having sex should always be something important and special and that a lot of myth surrounds the so-called importance of their initial sexual encounter.

While you are teaching your children about the importance of building relationships on far more than just sex, it is also important to combine this with teaching your teens about safe sex practices. However much you might want to do so you cannot always prevent your children from having sex. Nevertheless, you can provide yourself with some peace of mind by attempting to ensure that your children keep themselves safe, even if they choose not to listen to your advice to stand stand their ground and make wise choices.

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