What to wear when you're not the bride

A comprehensive guide to what to wear as a wedding guest

Deciding what to wear to a wedding is a very tricksy business. You have to dress well enough to be let into the church, but at the same time not well enough to upstage the bride. It's very easy for the special lady, she could prance down the aisle clad in a Hessian sack whilst whistling God Save the Queen and everyone would gasp and get all weepy. So what do you wear? Well the answer is very simple, it depends. Start off by reading the invitation very carefully; this should give you a clue as to what the look and tone of the day is. A good idea might be to phone a friend who's also going. Find out what they're wearing, copy it if necessary.

Taking the weather into account would also be a good idea. Try to find out if it's an outdoor ceremony, and plan accordingly. The last thing you want to do is be sweating through your wool blouse in the middle of the hottest day of the year. So many people forget to heed this advice, and they usually drop like flies before the bible reading.

Now when it comes to dressing your menfolk for the ceremony, try to keep it simple. Wear a suit. If it is summer, a lighter cotton suit is perfect. Depending on how formal it is, a tie might not be necessary. Shoes are also important. If given the chance most men would go in flip flops. This will not do. A pair of well made smart shoes may be on the pricey side, but they will last and are good for a variety of occasions. Motivate him by telling him that if he buys a good pair once, he might not need to go to the shops again for at least a couple of months. If this doesn't galvanize him, I don't know what will.

Women have a lot more options when it comes to dressing up for weddings. You can opt for dresses, skirts, or dress suits. Again, consider the time of year. In the colder months, darker, more somber colours will be perfect. In summer you can go lighter, but be wary of bright, bold colours. It could affect the bride's concentration, causing her to forget her vows or something equally terrible.

There are a lot of very bold fabric patterns out there, I wouldn't recommend wearing these. Stick to one colour or at least matching colours. Not only will you feel more confident about your outfit, you will blend unobtrusively into the crowd, which is what guests are supposed to do at weddings.

When it comes time for the mothers of the bride and groom to pick their outfits, I recommend they go together. This way one will know what the other is wearing which will avoid an unseemly incident. No one wants to see the matrons of honour in a catfight.

Above all, remember that the day is not about anyone but the bride and groom and celebrating their special day. A smile is the best accessory to any outfit.

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